You Got a Job Offer. Now They Want You to Stay. Here Is How to Handle It.
You just got a competing offer. Or maybe you asked for a raise and your company came back with a counter. Either way, you are holding leverage right now – and most people fumble it because they do not know how to respond.
I am going to give you the exact framework I use with my coaching clients in Seattle to evaluate, negotiate, and respond to counter offers. No fluff. Just the strategy.
What Is a Counter Offer and Why Does It Matter?
A counter offer happens when your current employer makes you a new offer to convince you to stay after you have either resigned or signaled that you are considering leaving. It usually comes as a salary bump, a title change, a bonus, or some combination.
Here is what you need to understand: a counter offer is not a reward for your loyalty. It is a business decision. Replacing you costs your company time and money – recruiting, onboarding, lost productivity. The counter offer is almost always cheaper than hiring your replacement.
That does not mean you should reject it automatically. But you need to evaluate it with clear eyes.
Before You Respond – Ask These 5 Questions
- Why did it take a resignation to get this offer? If your company only values you when you threaten to leave, that tells you everything about how they see your worth day to day.
- Does this fix the real problem? If you were leaving because of a toxic manager, more money does not fix that. If you were leaving for growth opportunities, a title bump without new responsibilities does not fix that either.
- Is this offer in writing? Verbal promises mean nothing. If they are not willing to put it on paper with a start date and specific terms, walk away.
- What happens in 6 months? Research shows that a significant number of employees who accept counter offers leave within a year anyway. Your manager now knows you had one foot out the door. That changes the dynamic whether anyone admits it or not.
- What does the new opportunity actually offer? Compare total compensation, not just base salary. Benefits, equity, remote flexibility, growth potential, culture – all of it matters.
How to Write a Counter Offer Response Email
Whether you are accepting, declining, or negotiating further, your email needs to be professional, specific, and short. Here is the framework.
If You Are Declining the Counter Offer
Keep it gracious and firm. Do not over-explain. You do not owe anyone a detailed justification for choosing what is best for your career.
Your email should thank them for the offer, confirm your decision to move forward with the new opportunity, offer to help with the transition, and express genuine appreciation for your time at the company. Three to four sentences is plenty.
If You Are Accepting the Counter Offer
Get everything in writing before you celebrate. Your response should confirm the specific terms you are accepting – salary, title, start date, any other promises made. Send it as an email so there is a record. Follow up with HR to make sure the changes are processed.
If You Want to Negotiate the Counter Offer Higher
This is where most people freeze up. But you have more room than you think.
The key is to be specific. Do not say “I was hoping for something higher.” Say exactly what you want and why. Reference your market value. Reference your contributions. Reference the competing offer if you have one.
Your email should express appreciation, state that you have reviewed the offer carefully, name the specific number or terms you are looking for, briefly explain why that number is justified, and ask if there is flexibility. Keep it to one short paragraph for your ask.
The Counter Offer Negotiation Rules I Give Every Client
- Never bluff. Do not claim you have an offer you do not have. If they call your bluff, you lose all credibility.
- Respond within 48 hours. Sitting on a counter offer too long signals indecision and can annoy both parties.
- Do not negotiate over text or Slack. Email or a scheduled conversation. That is it.
- Have your number ready before the conversation. Know your walk-away point and your ideal outcome before you open your mouth.
- Get it in writing. I will say it again because it matters that much.
When to Take the Counter Offer
Not every counter offer is a trap. Sometimes it genuinely is the right move. Take it if:
- The original reason you were leaving was compensation, and the new number actually fixes that
- You love your team, your role, and your growth path – the money was the only issue
- The terms are in writing with a clear timeline
- You trust your manager and have no reason to believe there will be retaliation
When to Walk Away
Walk away if:
- The problems are cultural, managerial, or structural – money cannot fix those
- You have been passed over for promotions or raises repeatedly and this is the first time they took you seriously
- The counter offer is vague or conditional
- Your gut says go – trust it
Need Help Deciding? That Is What I Do.
Counter offer situations are high-stakes and time-sensitive. You do not get a do-over. If you are sitting on a counter offer right now and you are not sure what to do, book a 30-minute coaching session and we will work through it together in real time.
I also have a Counter Offer Email Template in my templates shop if you want a proven, ready-to-customize framework you can send today.
Do not wing this. Your next move could be worth tens of thousands of dollars. Get it right.
Samantha Cook is a career coach and salary negotiation specialist in Seattle, WA. She helps corporate professionals negotiate raises, counter offers, and job transitions across the Puget Sound region including Bellevue, Redmond, Tacoma, Kent, and Covington.